Copyright 2008 T. Sheil & A. Sheil All Rights Reserved
A Heathen Perspective
If one mentions forgiveness around Heathenism, he usually gets a quizzical look. Forgiveness? That is a concept of monotheistic religions. What does it have to do with us?
Indeed, several religions treat forgiveness as a religious principle. Forgiveness is a major tenet of Christianity, Islam, Buddhism and to a lesser degree Judaism. For example, the Christian scriptures tell them to “forgive seven times seventy times”, meaning they should forgive as often as they are wronged. It is not just advice, but a religious doctrine.
The New Age took forgiveness to a new level. From it came a teaching that forgiveness invoked a great healing power which would bless both the forgiver and forgiven. According to this teaching, forgiveness’ power was so great that it would prevent all future transgressions. This concept was one of many “pop” New Age fads of the 1990s.
Adding fuel to the forgiveness fire are the occasional stories of people forgiving criminals for the most heinous crimes. Every so often, a human interest story crops up where the victim of a crime, or a relative of a victim, forgives the wrongdoer and then goes so far as to befriend him. Now and then they even embrace him and help him as if he were a needy cousin rather than the one who killed, maimed or raped a loved one. The media treats those people as if they are doing a great thing.
Among monotheistic sects there is an innate guilt that requires forgiveness from its god. We see this in concepts such concepts as “original sin”. It is a doctrine of people being somehow unworthy, and therefore needful of forgiveness.
Forgiveness is part and parcel of the doctrines of the other religions. We do not find mention of it in the Norse lore. There is no encouragement to forgive. It is notable for its very absence. Adding to possible confusion is the fact that German and Nordic society developed laws to settle disputes. A code of fines and penalties (wergild) plus a legal system did a good job of resolving disputes. One wonders why there is no admonition to forgive once things have been settled.
Back in 1991, I was blindsided by the forgiveness issue while giving a class to a mixed group of Pagans and New Agers. Toward the end of the class, one woman asked about the place of forgiveness. Before I could reply, another student who happened to be Heathen responded. His answer was brief and polite. Shaking her head, the woman asked what I thought of his answer. I had an inkling she wanted to hear of the “divine power of forgiveness.” Instead, I told her that I agreed with the other student.
Most of the class took it in stride. The class was about magick, not anything near forgiveness. Not her. She could not wait to leave. She believed that forgiveness had sacred power, and she felt that anyone who disagreed had to be wrong about everything. This attitude is common around the New Age and the more conventionally Christian of the Metaphysical schools. Their feeling is that to find one disagreeable idea is to find the whole package disagreeable.
At the point where the New Age collides with New Thought Metaphysics there is a fringe type of spirituality which blends hope and hokum. The result is “pop” spirituality combining altered tenets of religion and magick. Every so often, a new version comes around. It had been “channeled” messages for a while, and then along came “creative visualization.” Between them were such things as “love yourself to health,” “let the miracle power of forgiveness bring you happiness,” and “pray your way to prosperity.” The methods include watered-down versions of genuine magickal and mystical techniques which have been intentionally taken out of context. They mix in a little about God and the “Divine” and karma. They also add a slight hint of “You better love [pray, forgive, etc.]or bad things will happen....” The final product is “spirituality for sale.”
This is an extreme, but it serves to illustrate by contrast a more reasonable appreciation of the nature of forgiveness. This single concept serves to show the divide between us and monotheistic religions. What for them is a major religious tenet is for us not even worth mentioning in a religious text.
We will have to deal with these tenets for at least the next 200 years. Even if Heathenism becomes a major religion within this century, the monotheistic concepts are part of the lore and literature of our society. They are so interwoven we cannot escape them, and therefore we must assess and deal with them. Such tenets persist in everything from themes in literature and popular entertainment to common sayings, (e.g. “To err is human, to forgive is divine.”).
Again, we come to the paradox. A major tenet within the monotheistic religions gets no mention in ours. To understand this more clearly, we need to look at the preceding event necessitating forgiveness: wrongdoing. The spiritual attitude toward human mischief is the key whence we find a connection between human action and the nature of Divinity.
The monotheistic belief is that all wrongdoing is an offense against their god. Whether the wrong was initially aimed at a person, animal, place, or thing, it is ultimately an offense to the divine. Additionally, monotheists believe wrongdoing incurs a spiritual penalty [sin] that entails future punishment. The wrong and the penalty can only be rectified through a divine action. This is the beginning of forgiveness as doctrine. The wrongdoer must get divine forgiveness to avoid future retribution.
Heathens see wrongdoing in a very different light. The spiritual penalty, commonly known as “sin”, does not exist in Heathenism. An offense may incur consequences from Wyrd, but these will be a result of its natural cause-to-effect. It is not punishment. Any retribution will come from the wronged party or other agencies. That is where the wrong ends. The Gods do not enter the equation. For the Heathen, forgiveness is neither a religious issue nor a spiritual concept. It is a practical consideration.
The monotheistic traditions treat forgiveness as a spiritual duty. For them, forgiving is not just an option, but an obligation. Though the person does no wrong (sin) by not forgiving, he is going against the wishes of the god. Heathens are not obliged to forgive. There is no obligation or encouragement whatsoever. Here we find a significant difference between the traditions. A Christian, Jew, Muslim or Buddhist is fulfilling a religious duty when he forgives.. When a Heathen forgives, he is giving a gift.
Unfortunately, too many of us carried our definition of forgiveness from our monotheistic childhood. Forgiveness is simple. It is the act of pardoning an offense. By forgiving, a person is agreeing to drop any grudge or resentment for a wrong. Stated another way, the individual chooses to no longer hold the wrong against the offender.
By this definition, forgiveness is something we do all the time. The many small slights and accidents are usually shrugged off as nothing. We do not think of it as forgiveness because it is natural. Only a hothead or a very unhappy person would hold a grudge for every little error.
As humans capable of mistakes, it is natural that we overlook the small errors and faux pas of others. Just as our small errors are unintentional, we recognize the same of others. There is no offense and no resentment. Many small things are not even mentioned. A few may require a quick word of apology. “Sorry about that”, ‘My mistake,” or “No offense,” is usually enough We do not think of it as forgiveness because it is so slight.
When the offense is more than a passing error, forgiveness might not come so easily. We have to think about it first. Much has to do with the nature of the offense, its severity, the circumstances under which it was done, the offender and our relationship with him. All of these enter the equation.
Forgiveness can restore a shattered friendship, set the amends necessary to correct a situation, or adjust a relationship in view of past wrongs. Forgiveness may or may not be predicated on the offender taking action to rectify any damage he may have caused. That action can range from sincere words of apology to full restitution. Whereas the religious-based forgiveness of monotheistic faiths is supposed to be freely given, Heathen forgiveness can entail an obligation on the part of the offender. One may have to work or pay his way back into the good graces of those he offended. The ancient, legal version of it is wergild.
What our “freely forgiving” friends overlook is the severity of an offense. One cannot hope to forgive and then have things go back to the way they had been prior to the offense. Most wrongs do some kind of damage. The greater the damage, the more permanently it changes things in the present and future. Many things cannot be undone. A permanent change can create a whole new set of circumstances.
Heathen forgiveness seeks to resolve the problem. It is also ready to establish a new order over the ashes of the offense. As the more serious offenses cause a permanent change in the status quo, so a new balance must be struck between the offended and the offender.
Unless the problem is solved, forgiveness is an exercise in futility. It can become a revolving door of repeated affronts and broken promises. Whereas the monotheistic “forgive seven times seventy times” might abide it, we cannot! There is no point forgiving someone if he intends to keep repeating the same offenses. Forgiveness comes only after the problem is gone.
On the heels of solving the problem are matters of regaining trust, restoring goodwill and
restitution. An offender may have to regain the respect and friendship that he lost. In other cases, restitution of some form must be made to compensate for damages. Indeed, as offenses grow in their seriousness, so does the offender’s loss of standing with those he offended. A case of carelessness might take days to offset, but a matter of betrayal might require months or years before goodwill is regained. Heathen forgiveness depends on the offender’s willingness to make things right.
Some offenses will require negotiation. In others, it will be a case of “Do you love the offender more than you hate the offense?”
Sadly, there care cases where forgiveness is not possible. Some things are unforgivable. The offender can never regain the good graces of those he wronged. Thus do friends become estranged, lovers become enemies and acquaintances become strangers. There will be times when forgiveness is ill-advised, impractical or impossible. While it does no good to carry a grudge or nurse a resentment, it is wise to always remember the offense should you ever have to deal with that person again.
For the Heathen, forgiveness is one option for resolving an offense. It is given solely at the discretion of the offended party. The goal is to solve the problem, resolve the offense and mend or adjust the relationship with the offender.
Our place here is not to go into specific cases. This is but a general explanation of forgiveness as it related to Heathenism. Because of the proximity of religions which teach forgiveness as a religious doctrine, we are forced to make our own assessment of it.. The point of this discussion has not been to close the topic, but open it for examination by individual Heathens. Forgiveness is not a doctrine. Each must consider it for himself.
We have not discussed revenge or “non forgiveness” because they are beyond the scope of this article.
This article is a condensation of a section from a forthcoming book.
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